Developed originally for the iPhone, and now
available for PC, if a “crude, lewd and gritty law enforcement comedy”
might float your boat, you might want to give this a whirl.
Hector is a Detective Inspector in the British burg of
Clappers Wreake. Affectionately known as “the fat a.. of the law”, we
first encounter Hector’s said part trouserless in a police cell. The last
thing he remembers is doing a conga with either a goat or a nun and, while
waking in a police cell is not good, not waking next to a fat girl is
apparently a vast improvement. Getting out of the cell is the first order
of business, and involves a used condom and a toilet. Once successful, we
encounter the street youth chained to the radiator, who at first thinks
Hector is a “paedo”, and then wishes he was when finding out he is a cop.
If
that little paragraph has put you off, then you had probably better steer
clear. Crude and lewd it is, and crude and lewd it remains, all the way to
the cliffhanger end. It won’t be for everyone.
For
those who like a bit of crude and lewd, and not the subtle variety, then
Hector might be your man. A hostage-taking sniper has taken out 11 of the
best police negotiators, and the Tactical Weapons And Tactics team have
taken out a little old lady. A situation tailor-made for an obnoxious,
troublemaking alcoholic DI, assuming he can find his pants.
Hector’s first challenge (after his pants) is his car, and involves an
overweight prostitute, a Taser wielding old lady and a tramp. Having
arrived on the sniping field, Hector is given three tasks by the hostage
taker, who is seemingly on a mission to restore Clappers Wreake to some
sense of decency and splendour. If Hector can fix the clock, shut down the
paragon of porno and help the town reformer, the hostages will go free.
Like many animated point and click adventures, nothing is straightforward.
Once you get the tasks, all four destinations are open to you and you can
move freely between them all. Solving all three tasks necessitates that
you do so, as items in one place are used elsewhere. In that regard the
game is relatively open, although it’s a small game world to begin with.
All
the conundrums are inventory based, and at any one time you might have 6
or 7 items in play (depending on how you progress through the game).
Conversations are also triggers (as well as being rude, snide and
tasteless humour), and you will have to work through some dialogue trees
to get the right responses.
The
animation style suits the feel of the game, and there is a very British-ness
about some of the slang and the expressions. Most people with a passing
acquaintance to things pommy will know what a chip butty* is, but I had to
look up what an Asbo is (it’s an anti-social behaviour order, and
apparently essential for street cred).
There are (sassy) hints built in (Hector will give you a gob full on
occasion also). But it isn’t a hard game, especially for veteran conundrum
doers, and it took me about 5 hours. The game saves automatically and you
automatically start where you left off.
Badge of Carnage will definitely be a matter
of taste (and I am not talking about the chip butty). If South Park
or Robot Chicken gives you a laugh, Hector might as well. Just
don’t say you weren’t warned, and don’t expect resolution.
* For those not in the know, it is a heavily buttered
sandwich, filled only with chips (aka French fries but they have to be
fat) and a dollop of tomato sauce (aka ketchup).
Hector: Badge of Carnage –
Episode 1: We Negotiate With Terrorists is
available via download from
Telltale Games.
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April 2011
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