REM I agree with so much of what you are saying Becky! I've found that I get a scenario in my head way more than I post & then someone else posts & think 'oh'. (I'm sure I'm not the only one!) At the same time I like the challenge of adapting to twists & turns of the different ways of thinking. I love the co-operational thing of it & having to consider where someone else's head is at. Sometimes it's left with 'how are you supposed to follow that?' (like the crowbar with the emerald ) Do you think we are getting any better at it?

REM

If we are given the time and the space we will get great at it!

I pity the people who are new to this thread though, all the pages of text to be read before they know what this is all about!

Remark ended


Bernard

& then get pen & paper (reams!) to take lots of notes to keep up!

REM It's interesting to look back at the early posts in this thread, at how tentative we were in the beginning with the storyline, and at finding our individual voices. Then we unleashed our respective crazed imaginations, and lo, there was comedy! I've laughed so much at your genius. It's been great fun "working" with you all.

Remark ended

On with the adventure...

>exit The Whizzer's domain

You exit the grand palaces of The Whizzer. Outside, the evening air is crisp and cool, and a beautiful sunset forms across the horizon. You are filled with elated apprehension at the thought of defeating the giant Nero Beambar. You wonder how it will all come to pass. 500 Oompah-Loompahs are idling around the fountain; it appears to be Happy Hour. The fountain has been drained and converted temporarily into a wine bar. You shudder at the price of the Liebfraumilch. Your merry troupe passes by the colourful carousers, and heads back down the yellow brick road. After a short while you spot a turning which leads off towards the horizon, and it is here that the path transforms gradually from yellow to scarlet. Will you follow the scarlet brick road?

>will there be giants?

Undoubtedly.

>follow the scarlet brick road

You set off along the brightly coloured road. Far, far away you can hear yodelling; plumes of smoke rise into the air. Could the giant Nero Beambar be having a barbecue tonight? More importantly, will you receive an invite?

>_

> Walk towards smoke

You and your companions wend your way cautiously down the scarlet road, angling into the forest to your left, towards the smoke. Soon enough you can see flames flickering in between the trees, and over the roar of the fire you can hear a trio of playful voices. Gradually it dawns on you that you're walking towards an enormous midsummer bonfire, and playing in front of it are three children: two girls and a boy. The boy is gripping the younger girl by one arm and tugging her towards the fire.

"Why do I have to be the witch?" asks the girl. "I'm ALWAYS the witch! Make Cassie do it this time, I don't wanna!"

The girl who must be Cassie giggles lightly at this and then returns to staring quietly at the bonfire. Frowing, the boy tries to reason with his semi-captive.

"Look, Mia, you know how this works. You're the witch, I'm the inquisitioner, and Cas is...well...you know. Death. You KNOW you're the only one who can cast any spells! And Cassie...well, you know how she gets around fires."

"Fine, Mal," mumbles Mia sullenly. "But I'm only going doing it for a minute this time, I always feel silly standing around in the middle of that thing. Besides, I don't think Cassie like the heat so much." And before any of your party can react, she leaps foward into the flames.

A few moments later you can hear her voice from somewhere inside the bonfire.

"I curse you, Maleficus, curse you, do you hear me! You'll rue the day you chose to cross paths with a full-blooded witch! You and your little dog, too!"

Mal joins in the act by shaking his fist towards the flames. "In the name of Oz, I condem your spirit to the--"

The snap of a twig under your boot causes Mal to spin suddenly on his heel and glare at your party of adventurers. Cassie looks on with what appears to be mild interest while Mia can be heard blithely shouting from somewhere behind the flames.

"Oz? Ha! In the name of Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmannuel Ambroise Diggs, I spit at thee! What are you planning to do with me, anyway? Melt me? Fire can't harm witches, you silly twit! And what's this? OH NO! I'm melting, meeelting! Oh, what a world, what a world!"

"Quiet, Mia," says Mal in the usual tone of a boy trying to assert his authority over a girl he knows won't listen to him. "We have company."

>Introduce party

Over the increasingly nonsensical complaints from the bonfire and the curious stare of the oddly silent Cassie, you explain to the children that you're heading north on a quest.

>Ask about Nero Beambar

"Beambar?" asks Cassie. Her eyes have suddenly gained focus, as if she's seeing you for the first time. "I know of him. You have a long journey ahead of you, though. He lives far to the north, on top of Mount Ixnay, where the frozen wastes meet the impassable desert. It's REALLY cold there--Beambar's about the only creature who can stand to live up there. Dad says even the trees there turn blue in the winter. I wouldn't know though. We've only been there during the summer, and that was plenty cold for me."

"He's a lovely giant though. He has all sorts of wonderful stories...of course, the Whizzer doesn't like him much. But the Whizzer doesn't like ANYBODY. And no one likes him, not since he took over from--"

Cassie stops at a stern glance from Mal. "What got you so talkative all the sudden, anyway?" Mal turns a winning grin towards you. "We could take you there if you want. We've been there dozens of times, I'm sure mother wouldn't mind."

"Does this mean I can leave the fire now?" calls Mia. "I'm getting bored!"

You glance uneasily at your companions. "Well, Dirk?" you ask the most level-headed of your companions. "They ARE just children. Should we really be dragging them into this?"

"I dunno," says Dirk, shaking his head. "Age tends to be a little misleading around here. And besides, at least one of them's a witch. They could be useful." Dirk drops to a whisper. "Of course, there could be a little problem if we want to stay in the Whizzer's good graces, but I say we wait and make our own judgments about that giant. It's your choice, though."

>Invite children along

"Hurrah!" comes Mia's familiar voice, and quite suddenly the bonfire collapses in on itself, shrinking first to the size of a small hut, then a normal campfire, shrinking down, down until it finally is just a small flame enclosed in Mia's inverted palm. The three children lead off back towards the scarlet road, which you can see winding along through the trees towards the mountains far to the North.

Cassie hangs back for a moment and whispers conspiratorially to you. "Mia's not her full name, you know. It's Lamia. We call her Mia because it's easier to spell."

"Ah," says Lord Oscars. "Then is Cassie YOUR real name?"

"No. It's Occasus. But no one calls me that except mother..."

After a moment, it dawns on you that someone's missing.

"Where's Michael?"

Dirk grins maliciously. "About 500 yards up thatta way. Seems he's got this little...thing about fires. Especially big ones."

Laughing, you and your friends head back to the road, towards adventure. Adventure and the giant Nero Beambar. Nero Beambar, adventure, and Michael. And also Mount Ixnay. And the Impassable Desert. And the Frozen Wastes. You and your companions set off towards Adventure, Nero Beambar, Michael, Mount Ixnay, the Frozen Wastes, and the Impassable Desert. Amongst others.

> Continue up the scarlet road, walk, walk, walk...
Don't think you aren't on a right track, it's just that you have to walk for about 60 minutes to get to the icy land...
Don't bother looking around before you see some ice cause then you are likely to spend about 2 or 3 hours on the road.
So, you suddenly come to a tree with branches leaning down heavy with icicles covering the road. You try to go through the branches but when you touch one your hand gets stiff and you cannot move your fingers.
Turn to Lamia
> Mia, you say, can you please melt this tree for me?
She smiles and says
> Let me help you with your hand first
Her warm touch cures your hand, and she turns to the tree putting her arms forward and throws some flames at it.
The ice from the tree starts melting, but suddenly you hear its roaring voice
> You could have just politely asked me to step away...
Enraged, it grabs Michael...
>

REM Welcome back Iva.

End of Remark



... The tree holds Michael by one of his arms, high above the ground. You're MadChick handbag starts to ring.

>open handbag

You open the the handbag and you see an oilcan. You think "At last, what's an AG without an oilcan!"

>take oilcan, use it on Michael

Your aim isn't very good, so Michael is covered by the oil almost all over. The tree looses his grip on the arm. Another one of the branches grabs Mike by the nose. That's weird, Michaels nose is getting longer and longer and then it snaps. Michael falls down, he's free now. He is very angry and he yells at the tree that it's a smooth criminal. The tree seems to be upset and whispers some apologies, he drops the nose and runs away.

>pick nose

Please could you rephrase that!

>get nose

You take the nose, it's wet now. You give the nose to the scarecrow, he tries to put it in place but it keeps falling off.

Now Scarface complains that he hasn't been oiled all over in a long time! The oilcan is empty! This Greedy Bunch is becoming a big nuisance!

Well at least the road is no longer blocked.

>keep on walking

And you're going again. It's getting colder and colder.......




Bernard

REM
Do not think that I and other veteran lurkers aren't following all this.

> .......and colder and colder. The land to either side of the path is now covered in deep snow, but curiously not the path itself. You keep going & suddenly spot some large footprints in the snow to the right.
> Look at footprints. A magnifying glass & tape measure appear at the bottom left of the screen.
> Use magnifying glass on footprints. You see an impression of a famous tick & on one print an impression of a large round object on the sole.
> Use tape measure on length & width of footprint That is not the correct measurement. Try again. Size 94. You deduce that this is the print of a 12 foot tall giant wearing size 94 extra wide Tike trainers with a nail stuck in one of the soles.
Before backing out of the scene quickly nab the magnifying glass & tape measure & put in inventory for later use other than looking at & measuring footprints.

You decide it is not a good idea to follow the footprints & try to carry on, but Lord O'Scars is finding it difficult to move. His joints are starting to seize up. It is also starting to get very dark & everyone is hungry.

>"We need somewhere to shelter for the night" you say "something to eat and something to loosen up Lord O'Scars". Lord O'scars retorts with "Are you trying to tell me I'm up tight!"

Mia puts out her hand & a small flame appears in her palm. This emits a little light in the darkness.

You suddenly hear the voices of children whispering, "Please Mal, not there". You realise one of the voices is Cassie. "But, it will be pitch black in about 20 minutes" you hear Mal whisper "& Mia can't keep that flame going all night, besides we need something to help Lord O'Scars, it will be alright if we have grown ups with us, they will look after us".

Mal, suddenly aware that you've heard them says "We were just talking about 'The Cottage'. It's just behind those trees to the left" You can just make out the scared face of Cassie in the flickering flame. "We've always been told not to go there" she says "our mother told us that children have gone there and have never come back".

You ask your other companions. They all agree that sheltering for the night would be a good idea and they should be safe together.

You ask Mal, Cassie & Mia to lead the way. You step off the scarlet brick road & follow the children through the snow. Captain Dirk gives Lord O'Scars a 'piggy back' ride. The troupe can hardly see where they are going & trustingly follow the flicker from the flame in Mia's palm until they reach the door of the cottage.
> Open door. It slowly creaks open.
> Enter cottage.
>

You are in the kitchen, which is dimly lit by a meagre fire struggling to survive in the fireplace. Above the fireplace there hangs a huge cauldron, filled with water. In the middle of the room there stands a large wooden table. On the table are various cooking implements, but they do not resemble anything that you are familiar with. The floor is uncovered, the boards are old and broken in places. Mal, Cassie and Mia are looking anxiously around the room and at one another.

From outside you can hear a high-pitched voice, it is chanting, you can just make out the words as it approaches the cottage.

"Five bones, four bones, three bones, two, just enough to make my ssssssstew...."

You know that voice. Oh no Oh no Oh no. It is The Gribbler.

>HIDE!

Where will you hide? Hurry! - for The Gribbler is rattling at the latch....

>_

Hide under the table???? No he will look there first...
Hide in the cauldron???? No you will be cooked like a soop

Look left... There is some short of an old furniture... Move the furniture... There is some kind of secret passage behind it... You deside to go in there...

Go there and move back the furniture... It's pitch black now... You can't see nothing

> You all stand very still & try to breath quietly. You hear the door creak open and footsteps on the boards. All of a sudden they stop & you can hear the Gribbler sniffing "mmm" she says "I must be going mad, I thought for a minute I could smell children. Now that would be a treat, a nice juicy child to stew" Pepe Le Pew thinks quickly & as quietly as he can 'sprays' the three children. The Gribble starts to sniff the air again & then her armpits. "It must be that new anti-perspirant, it's better than I thought".

>

You are between laughing and vomiting... You thinking "My anti-perspirant is better! Smells like grass"... You try to look through a little hole on the furniture... You can see only the fireplace and a green frog on the table... Could that be the lost Prince? No kissing tonight...

You hear footsteps and the squeak of the door. The Gibbler must have left the building. The stench in the small room is taking your breath away and you decide the best thing to do is crawl out.

Back in the kitchen you see the Gibbler tricked you, she didn't leave at all!
She looks at you and your companions and says:"Well, look at that, what a load of food walked into my house. There's even some canned food too!"

Swiftly you put your hand in the handbag, no new items! Then you feel there's something in a side compartment. You take it out and see it's a little round box that's made of silver.

>open box

Inside the box is a small mirror, some powder and a pad.

>use box on Gibbler

You hold the open box right before her eyes. She looks at the mirror and her face turns green. "Oh by the unholy Black Magica, that's the ugliest face I've ever seen!" she says "I'll get that plastic surgeon who did this to me, I'm gonna give him a face lift so thorough he'll be breathing through his belly button!".
She storms out of the cottage.

>open door

You open the door and enter the living room. On a table is a cage with some bones in it. The bones look at you.

>open cage

The bones step out of the cage. "Thank you dear person, that is awfully nice of you. My name is Bear, these are my brothers Beck and Thony. We were on a quest to gain more length and a better sense of humour, but the ugly Gibby caught us."




Bernard

> "Why do you want to be longer?" you ask the bone brothers. They all look at each other & start to blush slightly. "We are um.. aspiring actors" says Bear "Our dream is follow in the footsteps of the great family dynasties, the Carradines, the Bridges, the Fondas. Pinky & Perky etc. We want to audition for the leg parts in Steven Spielbergs new film 'Giraffic Park' but we're not long enough." "I see" you say "but why do you need a better sense of humour?" Beck answers this time "because when we told our family & friends they all started laughing & said 'you must be having a giraffe'. We just don't know what that means & why it's so funny." You think for a minute & then say "but surely there needs to be four of you". Thony chips in excitedly "because if we pass the audition we'll be co-starring with the famous actor E-bone-eezer Eastwood who has already been given the part of the fourth leg"

The rest of your companions are listening intently. Mal whispers something to Mia who you just catch quietly saying "Yes, I can try". Mal then speaks to the brothers "We think Mia might be able to help you with the length" Mia turns to you & asks you to measure Bear with the tape measure & then click on tape measure again.
> Use tape measure with bear. Click on tape measure again & towards the end of it you see some very small writing appear.
> Use magnifying glass on script to read 'giraffe leg'. Mia clenches one of her hands, whilst muttering something & then opens it again to reveal some dust. She scatters this over Bear & he slowly starts to grow longer. He is now giraffe leg length.
Starting with the tape measure the same procedure is repeated, next on Beck then Thony.

"Oh, thank you!" the brothers cry "oh thank you, we don't know how to repay you but there is a key hidden at the bottom of the cage which may be useful. We will be on our way now to find a better sense of humour as we won't find one here. It was so nice to meet you all. Goodbye."

The bone brothers exit the cottage and you hear a chorus of 'We Bones, we Bones, we Bro Bones....' gradually fade into the distance.

>

>inspect room

Looking around the living room you see it's a big mess. You look at the fellows and see they are hungry, you yourself could use some food too. You're lucky your in the mess. Everyone sits down at the tables and dig in. Later you feel like a stuffed turkey, the others look satisfied also. All the food has been eaten, only some butter is left.

>take butter, use it on OScars

You grease the tin man, he seems to be thankful. "That feels so much better, if only somebody could rewind me." he says. You point at the winding staircase in the corner of the mess. He nods and walks up and down the stairs a couple of times.

>go upstairs

You also walk up the steps but alas it leads to nowhere. You walk back down again.

On the right are two doors, they both are locked.

>look left door

There's a small keyhole visible.

>look right door

No keyhole but some kind of time lock, it's set for the next morning.

>get key from cage

At the bottom of the cage is a newspaper.

>Take newspaper

After taking it you have a quick look at it, just the usual stuff like 'Dragon Attacks Village!!!'. Nothing can be done with the paper but you keep it, it may come in handy later, if you have to start a fire. There's a small key at the bottom of the cage. You take it.

>use key on left door

The door opens, in the room is only a bed. Not much room for so many people! You take out the measuring tape to find out what the exact size of the bed is. You measure the comp's also. After a lot of calculating you know how everyone can sleep in the same bed at he same time. All fall asleep.

The next morning a bright light, shining in your eyes, awakes you. Leaving the bedroom and back in the big mess you notice the right door is open now.

>go outside

Outside you see a gigantic giant with a flashlight, he's wearing a sweater with red and white stripes. You rub your eyes, hardly believing this could be for real. Taking a better look you realize it's not a giant but a lighthouse!




Bernard

>so we're on the coastline already then

It would appear so, otherwise that's a real weird place to put a lighthouse.

>enter lighthouse

The door of the lighthouse is locked.

>peer over edge of cliff

I hope none of you have vertigo. You all peer over the edge of the cliff. Idling in the shallow shore water is a large rubber dinghy.

You confer with your comrades. "If we travel by dinghy it would make a most excellent shortcut to the land where the giant Nero Beambar resides." Everyone agrees. Lord O'Scars voices concern that the salty sea breeze might affect his joints.

>go back in cottage and stock up on butter

You return to the cottage and fill your handbag with pats of butter. If the sun starts shining things are gonna get messy, buster!

>look

There is a metal ladder leading down from the edge of the cliff to the shore.

>climb down ladder

You all climb down the ladder. With a collective effort you jump inside the waiting dinghy. My goodness, there are a lot of you now. The dinghy groans in protest, but thankfully does not sink.

You begin to paddle out to sea. Hooray for oceanic shortcuts! What could possibly go wrong???

>_

You row the boat gently but suddenly Michael starts to rock the boat! While calming him down, a big tidal wave approaches. The wave gets a hold on your dingy and throws you back at the shore.

You're at a beach, a woman with a dog is here. She's staring at the sea. When you're near her, she says "Look over there, it looks like something is floating there.". Looking in the direction the lady points, you notice she's right. You turn back to her and ask if she knows what it could be. Before you can open your mouth the lady and the vagabond dog disappear!

>examine dingy

The dingy is reduced to a thingy, nothing useful is left.

>turn around

There's an abandoned village close to the beach, the only sign of life you are some chickens pecking the ground. Most of the houses are in a terrible state. Only a barn looks to have escaped the teeth of time.

>enter barn

Some bats are in here sleeping. A big chest can be found at the other end of the barn.

>open chest

It seems to locked, Michael steps forward with his cute little crowbar and offers to open it. You accept and Michael forces the lid open.

>look at big chest

Some items are in there, a tripod, some canvas cloth and some fishing line.

>grab all

You can get the items but hands off the chest!

>leave barn, go north

You're confronted with a cliff, there are stairs leading up but some of the steps are badly damaged. Looking around in despair, you notice a small pottery behind the barn ......



Bernard

A small voice clucks importantly behind you. "We could probably help with that."

You turn to see a rooster puffing semi-majestically behind you, flanked by another three roosters and about six hens. They mill about, waiting expectantly, while you search for whoever it was who spoke to you. Before you can move though, the rooster speaks again.

"Yes, that's right, I'm a talking rooster. Honestly you'd be hard-pressed to find an animal that doesn't talk in these parts, and even if you ARE an adventurer just ported in from wherever-it-is-I'm-sure-I-don't-care, I'd expect you to have adjusted a bit better by now. Name's Dorothy, by the way. So's theirs."

"So's what?" you ask, confused.

"Their names. We're all named Dorothy."

"I'm sorry," asks Lord Oscar, "but...aren't you a rooster?"

Dorothy fluffs his feathers indignantly. "Yes. And what of it?"

"Well," you reply, "it's just, that... Well, you can't ALL be named Dorothy."

"It's not our fault," insists the rooster. "That's what our mother named us. She thought it awfully convenient. Personally I find it a royal pain in the tailfeathers." Maybe it would be best to redirect this conversation. Quickly.

"Dorothy it is, then. You said you could help us. How so?"

"We can open the way for you, but first you have to answer a simple question for us."

"Okay, shoot."

"What is the 27th word on the fourth line on page 1,729 of the manual?"

"Oh no," groans Mia huffily. "Here we go again..."

> "Where can I find the manual?" you ask. "In the pottery of course" Dorothy replies.
> Walk to the entrance of the pottery. There are double wooden doors locked tight. No way of getting through that way. Above them is a large arched window with the glass missing......

CUT SCENE: On the Starship Bentbutflise, navigator Tickov, chief engineer Spotty, lieutenant O'Hairy & logic officer Sock have been glued to the screen watching the movements of the troupe on the ship's large monitor. O'Hairy addresses Sock, 'Sir, looks like we are going to be waiting for our new uniforms for ever, sir. It's too late now to liaise with Reynolds & the Fieryfly but I've been browsing the outernet & I've seen some nice knee length Doc Martins & Davy Crockett hats in a variety of sizes & colours on E-bay. They come with free matching knee warmers. Please, can't we just beam the captain up.' 'That's not logical' says Sock 'we don't have a Paypal account, our leotards are in a suitcase that the Whizzer has possession of & besides....I've never come across an Adventure Game before, it's fascinating. I think I'd like to join in.' END OF CUT SCENE

INTERCEPTION ON CHRISSIE'S POST:

The Vulcan
Illegal Boomer
Not Registered
0 Posts
Loc: Space, the final frontier

> Combine tripod with fishing-line to get grappling hook & rope.......
chrissie: > Hey, just a minute Sir Sock! That was my idea & this is MY post. You have to register to post.
The Vulcan > Use grappling rope & rope with arched window.
chrissie: > Oi pointy ears, can't you read. Will you please stop interrupting my post or else!
The Vulcan: > Climb rope & enter pottery through window...
chrissie: > That's it you green-blooded weirdo, if you don't stop stealing my ideas & stop posting on my post I'm going to....
um, I'm going to.......... make up a scenario that kills off captain Dirk, so there!!!
END INTERCEPTION OF POST

CUT SCENE: 'I think she means it sir' O'Hairy says 'she's losing her decorum rapidly & she could probably do with keeping what little she had in the first place'. Sock is now sulking 'Spoilsport. O'Hairy, register me on GameBoomers.' O'Hairy presses a few buttons 'Sorry sir, outernet's down. Asteroid storm sir.'
END OF CUT SCENE

(Game resumes normally)

> Once in the pottery unbolt the doors & let your companions in.
>

Simultaneously, onboard a Bentbutflies in a universe almost but not completely identical to the one with which we are familiar:

"What was that, Officer Sock?"

"Sensors indicate the collision of two posts created a minor temporal anomaly. Improvising..."

"Impro-what-now?"

"Compensating, captain. I'm compensating."

<TIME STREAMS MERGED. RESUME NORMAL GAME PERAMETERS>

The Dorothys are waiting!

Inside the pottery light streams in through the high arched windows around the room giving a spacious airy feel to the place. It looks like any normal pottery, potters wheels, sinks, blocks of new clay etc.
> Look around. See a diagram on the wall.
> Look at diagram. There is a sketch of a flight of steps with arrows pointing to some of them. Next to it is another sketch of a 'big wheel' with a set of numbers next to it. Note numbers
24, 10, 11, 8, 19, 7, 12, 13, 14, 9.
> Look around some more & see a door with a notice.
'Please do not enter when red light is on'.
> Open door. Enter a small room with a huge kiln to the left & a set of bookshelves to the right.
> Look at books. Lots & lots of pottery books. Ah, here's a thick book just entitled 'Manual'.
> Look at manual & turn to page 1,729. The writing is tiny.
> Use magnifying glass on page 1,729 & count to find the 27th word on the fourth line. It's 'funtime'.
> Exit pottery remembering to pick up grappling hook & rope. Dismantle to get tripod & fishing line.
> Go back to the Dorothys & tell them that the answer to the question is 'funtime'. The Dorothys all start jumping up & down clucking & cockadoodledoodling excitedly. They all then disappear into their barn & emerge wheeling a 'big wheel' which they leave at the bottom of the steps. (That's funny, you never saw the 'big wheel' in the barn - maybe it was in the chest) "Tell us when you're ready" says Dorothy.
> Examine the 'big wheel'. It has what looks like chicken sized ejector seats all round the outside which are all linked to a central keypad with numbers ranging from 1 - 25 & 'Enter'.
Yes, I think we know how this is going to work.
> "We're ready", you say. The four roosters & six hens excitedly run over to claim a seat on the big wheel.
> Enter the numbers you noted earlier & press 'Enter' on the keypad. The wheel starts to spin & the first Dorothy is ejected, propelling her clucking & flapping through the air to land on 'step 24'. You hear the noise of some mechanism coming from underneath the bottom few steps. The wheel continues to spin & one-by-one the Dorothys patiently waiting for their turn are ejected to land on the various steps, each time the noise of the mechanism gets louder until the last Dorothy has taken their place. The bottom steps then open inwards (like a door) to reveal a passageway through the cliff. On closer inspection you see another staircase inside.
> "Thank you all" you shout to the Dorothys. You hear a voice shouting back "Hey, we're not finished yet, that was only half the fun. You've got to get us down now."
> Look in handbag to get red lipstick. It's very greasy. It's covered in butter.
> Use lipstick with canvas cloth to get canvas cloth with target drawn on it.
> Combine this with fishing line four times to get canvas cloth with fishing line attached to each corner.

CUT SCENE: You, Lord O'Scars, Michael & Dirk each take one of the fishing lines to hold out the canvas cloth. One-by-one the Dorothys jump from their steps to land on the canvas cloth, bounce up & down a few times & then off onto the ground clucking & cockadoodledoodling. They haven't had so much fun for years. END OF CUT SCENE

>

No need to stay here any longer, so you all wave the chickens goodbye. You wonder where the stairs will lead you, there's just one way to find out.

>climb the stairs

It's a long way up but finally you're at the top.
There's a little girl with a skateboard here, she's dressed in black.

>talk to girl

"Hi little girl, what's your name?"
She looks very angry at you and says: "Yo dude, who do you think you are, calling me little, the name is Red Riding Hoodlum and you better show some respect!"
"Why are you wearing black clothes Red." She replies "Well, it's a long story but I will keep it short. I don't like the colour black that much and wish I could be wearing red again. I dated a wolf some months ago, then I broke up with him. Ever since, he has been stalking me. I wear the black outfit as a disguise, that wolf isn't very bright you see."

>ask red about the giant

"Yes, I know where he lives, it's pretty far from here. You can use the Transportation Tree though!" She points at a tree with a big opening in it. "Just go into the tree and you will be transported to a tree near the giants house, you will recognize it immediately, it's very small!"

You doubt she's speaking about the same giant but you will give try.

>enter tree

You walk through the tree and you're in front of a little house. There's a shield above with the text "Beambar Mansion". At least the name is right!

>knock on door

A small man with a big nose and large feet steps out of the house, he looks up at you and asks what you want from him. "Are you Nero Beambar, the giant?"
"That's me alright!"
"Aren't you a little small to be a giant?"
He sighs, then answers "Yeah, how many times have I heard that question before, you think. I'll explain it to you, ever since I was born I suffered from RPS. I see that you don't know that illness, it's Reversed Perspective Syndrome. The further you are away from me the bigger I look, when you come closer I look smaller!"

You don't want do this nice dwarf any harm! Maybe the little man can be healed ....


Bernard

>ask Michael for the emerald-encrusted crowbar

You request said item from Michael. He passes it across to you a little reluctantly. "Hey man, don't be doing anything weird with it, I want it back 'cos it's shiny and matches my glove."

>wave emerald crowbar at Nero Beambar

Nothing happens. The batteries may be flat?

>shake and thump emerald crowbar

The emerald crowbar splutters into life.

>wave re-energised emerald crowbar at Nero Beambar

You wave the emerald crowbar in front of the giant Nero Beambar. Green sparks erupt and envelop him. Something appears to be happening, but you're not exactly sure quite what. The sparks subside, and you examine your new friend for any obvious signs of change. He is still small, he still has a big nose and large feet. You have failed.

>give emerald crowbar to Mia

Mia takes the crowbar. She intones and mutters, and slowly moves the crowbar to and fro, diagonally across the area in front of Nero Beambar. Something is happening... the ground beneath the giant's feet begins to tremor.... the almighty healing power of SPR (Syndrome Perspective Reversed) is taking place. With a pop and a squelch, Nero Beambar now stands before you, a proud man of normal height and girth and other essential dimensions. He inspects himself with delight, whooping gleefully. "You have cured me! Whatever you ask, it shall be yours! I am your humble servant!"

>_

You shake your head, realizing your quest for the Whizzer may already be over.

"Don't offer so much for such a simple act, Nero. Your friendship will be payment enough. All we'll be asking is your hospitality, and maybe a few questions answered."

"Of course!" bellows Nero, his voice somehow louder than before. "Where are my manners? Come, come, I'll show you around, and then, of course, I'll have to have you for dinner." Cassie coughs significantly at this and Nero looks embarrassed.

"Sorry. Still used to "entertaining" salesmen when they come by trying to sell me cutlery and encyclopedias and I want to get rid of them quickly. I meant, of course, you'd be welcome to dine with me tonight."

> Accept offer.

As you walk along the corridors towards what appears to be a very large library, you glance out the window for a few moments, then call Mia quietly over to your side.

"Mia, how exactly did that spell work?"

Mia glances up at you and frowns. "Oh, well, that was kind of complex. Basically I used the power in Michael's emerald to focus, and tried to bring Nero's perspective more in line with ours."

"In line with ours? What do you mean?"

"Well, I imagined you standing there, and then superimposed an image of Nero over it, adjusting for perspective. More or less. It's kind of hard to describe."

"And you're sure you didn't get things a little backwards?"

"Backwards? I don't think so...why?"

"Well, it's just that when I looked out the window just now, I noticed we all seem to be taller than most of the trees around here."

Mia flushes and looks at the floor. "Oh," she mumbles. "Oops."