The most important thing is to enjoy your life - to be happy - it's all that matters.
Audrey Hepburn


Harold was an old man. He was sick and in the hospital. There was one young nurse that just drove him crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child. She would say in a patronizing tone of voice, "And how are we doing this morning, or are we ready for a bath, or are we hungry?"

Old Harold had had enough of this particular nurse. One day, Old Harold had breakfast, pulled the juice off the tray, and put it on his bed side stand. He had been given a urine bottle to fill for testing. The juice was apple juice. So .. you know where the juice went!

The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it. "My, but it seems we are a little cloudy today .."

At this, Old Harold snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, "Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time."

The nurse fainted ...! Old Harold just smiled!

DON'T MESS WITH OLD PEOPLE!!!!

****************

As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats milk was used.

She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing.

"These", she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce."

She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"

A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours."

**************

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence.

One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me," said one boy. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me." He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off.

Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. "Come here quick," said the boy, "you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls."

The man said, "Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk." When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled to the cemetery.

Standing by the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me..."

The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin' the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord." Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

At last they heard, "One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done."

They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the boy on the bike.

************

The neighbour dropped in on a friend and found her sitting at the kitchen table, staring blankly at a half-empty cup of coffee; her three kids squabbling loudly in the other room.

"What's wrong Marge ?" she asked.

Marge told her that she had "morning sickness."

Surprised, the neighbour said, "I didn't even know you were pregnant!"

"I'm not." the harried young woman replied. "I'm just sick of mornings."

***********

I hope that all of you in the path of the storms stay safe!

Joe lost internet in the storms and has tornado warnings so he can't get here to start your day. I'm here to guide you through.


Step 1. Stretch. Get up and smile because you woke up to another day.
Step 2. Have some coffee or tea and log into GameBoomers.
Step 3. Have a happy day!

JoeAna

Thanks, Ana!

Hope Joe is safe and well.

Everyone!

Good Morning Ana, Mag Joe and everyone. Hope Joe is safe too. Ana thanks for opening the diner. MaG how are you doind? Coffee and tea are ready. A rainy morning here. May the sun shine on your day Boomers!

Good morning everyone. I hope Joe and any of our Boomers in the tornado area are safe. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Sunday. Breakfast out and a Sam's trip today. Danish, Scrambled Eggs, Hash Browns, Bacon, Sausage, BB Pancakes, and Toast in the NC.

Good morning everybody.

I got up a few minutes ago and peeked at my internet, and was very surprised to see I had a connection.

It's still storming here right now, but the tornado threat has subsided because the temperature has dropped..

We had tornados here. Tornados in Dallas did terrible damage.

I hardly slept last night but it wasn't because of the weather.

Time to go make some coffee.

Thank you Ana.

joe

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, what a relief. We were all worried about you. Sad about the tornados.

Ana, thanks for opening for us.

MaG, wishing you a good day!

Gerry, thanks for the coffee.

Connie, thanks for the Danish and have a great day!

Church this morning and taking the girls out to lunch. Wishing a great day to All!

Joe, good to see you safe and sound!

Good morning Gail, Connie, Gerry, MaG and all to follow!

Off to the city shortly with my niece to see my son, my ex and my ex father in law. She missed them so we are going visiting.

Ana

for opening the diner Ana.

Have a good day Boomers.

Whew! Glad you are OK Joe, and thanks Ana for keeping the Diner open. Scary stuff those tornado thingies.

It's So COLD here. It went down to 38 last night and in my house it's 55 degrees. I'm freezing. Just turned on my good old wall heater. Should warm it up in a little while. Meantime, I'm running my fingers under hot water to get them to move. Hasn't been this cold in YEARS.

Peacock arrives at the warmest time of day now (sometimes after dark) and the smallest Outdoorsie, who my friend has named Mini-Me, sleeps in until she sees the sun is warming up the sunny spots. She is now too large to squeeze through the gap in the wire around the vent that goes under the house, so she has chosen to 'live' under the Orchid Cactus bed. It's about 6' by 12' of dense Orchid Cactus and has always been a spot for kittens to be safe from predators. Sharp thorns on some of those plants and lots of hidey holes and a maze of paths to follow. As for the name, Mini-Me, she is an almost exact duplicate of one of my older yard cats. The only difference is that her front paws have white tips, while Digger, the older one (probably the same lineage) has almost fully white front legs. Have to look closely now that Mini-Me is growing fast. They are almost the same size now! Digger is at least 5 years old maybe older, I'll have to check my log, and Mini-Me is no more than 3 months old. I think she's going to be a BIG cat.

Reminder to self: No matter how much you have been craving fried shrimp, and how cheap the sale was, and even though the bag has two sealed bags inside for portion adjustment, NEVER heat up a whole bag and eat it all in one sitting. Never never never! Oh they were so good. Yummy, crisp, made my own seafood sauce and just ate the entire plate. I'm still paying for it this morning. Spent a restless night with my tummy screaming, "why did you do that?". Next time, only half the package half bag. Yup. Learned my lesson.

Wishing everyone a WARM day and no more bad weather!

Yeah Sorta, live/eat and learn. Ever since becomming vegge I don't binge out on certain foods like seafood and beefbeefbeef -Oh I dearly miss that roast beef especially at Christmas time. But too bad, I'll be vegge forever and maybe a vegan, who knows.

Thanks for the Princess Penelope update. Do you have a warm place for her? The closest here to the Princess are cranes but they might be migrating -south if they are smart. Weather here today and a few more is cccoolllddd and how!!!!! And me, a Yankee from Niagara Frontier in New York complaining about cold weather.vvvvvvvvvvgffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff Maura (kitty) says Hi.

Must look up orchid cactus -I have that epiphite which some call orchid cactus and mine isn't a cactus at all. mine is the epiphylum oxypatalum and they like to climb trees and have beautiful big flowers at night. Mine has white, the most common but there are pink or blue too.

Anyway happy Sunday all

Howdy ho, sweet JoeAna! Thanks for opening the Diner! Have a happy Joe's Sundiner!

Joe, so glad to hear you are safe!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

Have had three days full of family, fun, and laughter! Meeting with more family today for dinner! It's been truly lovely!

Alrighty, gotta skoosh! See you later!

Hi Yankee, Penelope the Peacock is only in my yard for about 1/2-2 hours a day depending on weather and her 'hunt' for bugs and tender plants to eat. I have no idea where the heck she actually sleeps. Most likely in a tree about 3 houses down from whence she comes. Sometimes if it's raining, she appears wet but not soaked, so she obviously has shelter. They have a chicken coop or house over there. They have had turkeys, ducks, chickens, etc. When Penelope was sadly sitting on a nest of her eggs which had no chance of hatching, she disappeared for 2 weeks and then appeared in a rush each day after, announcing her arrival and departure by hooting and honking. Very fun. She would eat fast and then go right 'home'. Animal control came after someone complained about her and we tried to help them catch her, but no luck. She's way too smart. I think she's happy roaming from house to house. She has a routine and looks healthy. I'd rather she be re-located to a nice farm with other peacocks, but don't think that will happen any time soon given her ability to avoid capture.

As for the Orchid Cactus, they are huge, chunky 3-sided light green 'leaves' which grow about 12-18 inches in a section then divide into another section making a long chain. Some crawl up the walls of my house using long string-like sticky things. That variety has HUGE blooms. They are about 8-10 inches across. Others that don't climb are flat-leafed, do the same extension by adding on to the ends of sections and most are white blooms or pink, or red about 6-8 inches across. One has more delicate leaves/stalks and is the only one I know that has an actual name. It's called Firecracker and blooms around summer. Tiny delicate 'falls' of thin flowers looking for all the world like a fireworks display. The rest all had names when my Dad had the hobby but the lettering (in marker pen) has long since washed away.

They reproduce by just cutting between the sections and plopping them in the dirt or any type of soil. Easy to grow. The fun is they SMELL really nice at night, but in the daytime no odor at all, AND each bloom only lasts from dusk till dawn ONE night. Gotta see them while they are there. Imagine me rushing out in the pitch dark cold night to snap a picture or just stand and admire. Very fun.

I guess these Orchid Cactus things sell for mega bucks for one little section. I've looked them up on the net and it's amazing how much they want for them. When I did a major 'cutting back' when I first 'inherited' them, I put the cuttings out front of my house with a FREE sign and they were scooped up in an instant all by one person. They must know the value. Now I plant the cuttings myself. Wish they didn't have thorns. They are tiny and hard to see and I'm always getting stuck. ugh.

Still cold around here today. Missing my warm summer weather although in the sun outside (went out to watch the police) it's very nicely warm. Cold breeze warm sun. Inside my house it's about 60 now after having the wall heater on for 3 hours. Old house, drafty, loads of windows, no way to really fix it without a total rehab. I will live with it. Maybe I'll actually have to put on REAL shoes instead of my sandals.

Ahhhh, mad scientist-ing done for the day. Now hubby is up....he has to package it all up. Time to rest the back a bit....

Good night Boomers.

Night, Space.

I'll be next. Sweet dreams all

Night all. See you in the morning. Thanks Ana for opening the diner for all of us this morning.

Midgie