He who laughs, lasts!
Mary Pettibone Poole
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names ...and small American flags were mounted on either side of it.

The seven-year-old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly, "Good morning, Alex."

"Good morning," replied the young man -- still focused on the plaque.

"What is this?" Alex asked.

"Well, son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.

"Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque.

Little Alex's voice was trembling .. and barely audible ... when he asked, "Which service? ... the 8:30 .... or the 11:00?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Jack's mother ran into the bedroom when she heard him scream and found his two-year old sister pulling his hair. She gently released the little girl's grip and said comfortingly to Jack, "There, there. She didn't mean it. She doesn't know that hurts."

She was barely out of the room when the little girl screamed. Rushing back in, she asked, "What happened?"

"She knows now," Jack replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A teacher is droning away in the classroom when he notices a student sleeping way up in the back row. The teacher shouts to the sleeping student's neighbor, "Hey wake that student up!"
The neighbor yells back, "You put him to sleep, you wake him up!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Sidney was a 14-year-old boy with an interest in the sciences. One summer day he started his own investigations. With his 12-year-old sister Sophie in tow, he caught a large bull frog in a local pond. Sidney started his experiment with the amphibian, and told Sophie her job was to write down the results of the experiment.

Sidney drew a line in the sand, placed the frog on the line, and prodded the frog with a small twig from the rear and shouted, "Jump, frog!" The frog jumped, and Sidney measured the distance. "12 feet...write that down, Sophie," he said.

Next, he brought the frog back to the starting point and removed the frog's right front leg. Again he prodded the frog and shouted, "Jump, frog!" The frog jumped 10 feet, and on instruction, Sophie wrote it down.

Again the frog was brought back, the left front leg was removed, and again "Jump, frog!" Sidney reported, "Six feet...write it down."

The next time, Sidney removed the large right back leg. "Jump, frog!" Then, he shouted "Jump, frog!" and prodded the frog. "The frog jumped 8 inches...write it down, Sophie."

Finally, Sidney removed the frog's remaining back left leg, put it down and prodded the frog with the twig shouting, "Jump, frog! Jump, frog! JUMP FROG!! JUMP JUMP FROG!!!"

The frog didn't jump. Sophie looked at Sidney, and said, "So what should I write down?"

Sidney thought a moment, then told Sophie to write, "When you remove all the legs from a frog, it becomes deaf."


(No frogs were hurt in the making of this joke)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A three year old walked over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office.

He inquisitively ask the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"
She replied, "Im having a baby."

With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?"
She said, "He sure is."

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?"
She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby."

With an even more surprised and shocked look, he asked...
"Then why did you eat him?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joe and Wanda had a small apartment in the city and they decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their ten-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighbourhood activities.
To a young boy, they thought, spying would be a lot of fun and would distract him for an hour or so.
The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation.
"There`s a car being towed from the parking lot," he said.
"An ambulance just drove by."
A few moments passed.
"Looks like the Andersons have company," he called out.
"Matt`s riding a new bike and the Coopers are making whoopie."
Mom and Dad shot up in bed. "How do you know that?" the startled father asked.
"Their daughter Jenny is standing out on their balcony too," his son replied.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie.

I'm a little short on time again.

Imagine that.

I'm not sure what'll be in store for me today, in the store, but I'm sure there won't be a dull moment with my managers.

SO....early to bed & early to rise makes a man......



Yep


I don't give a about going to work, but when that 2:00 o'clock sounds I'll be singing a different tune believe U me.







Have a happy day everyone.

joe

thanks for the chuckles Joe. I was laughing out loud.

Happy Friday to you and all!

Ana

Have a great Friday Joe, Ana, and all the Boomers to follow.

Hey ya Joe, Ana, and Quest

Beautiful day here 77%

Bella and I went for a scoot to the barn
helped feed 75 horses and water them
then i brushed Mojo for 2hours its sooo
relaxing

all boomers have a great day OK!! Doc

SpaceQ, happy Friday!

Doc, glad you got to go to the barn today. How is the lighter chair working out for you?

Good Friday morning to everyone. Hope you all have a great TGIF

Have a great Friday Joe, Ana, SQFan Doc, Manxman
and all who follow later.

Howdy ho, sweet Joe! Thanks for the openers and hope your Friday's fab-u-lous!!

Good morning, sweet 'Boomies!

It's Hubby and my anniversary, so I'm taking the day off!

To all 'Boomies, have a happy Friday!!

Good Morning Joe, Ana, SpaceQ, manxman, Karen, Haroula and Darlene. Joe great funnies. Ana have fun Friday. Karen happy to hear you still get to enjoy the horses. It is such a wonderful feeling working around horses. I do miss it! SpaceQ, manxman and Haroula have yourself a great day too. Darlene Happy Anniversary! How many years? Enjoy Friday everyone! Coffee is on Cailyn!

Good morning everyone. Joe and Ana, I'm happy your tests came back good. Darlene, Happy Anniversary. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful TGIF. Danish, Honey Buns, and Waffles, in the NC.

Good Morning Boomers

Joe, hope 2:00 o'clock comes quickly for you.

Ana, enjoy whatever the day brings today.

Manxman, good morning.

Haroula, happy day!

Darlene, Happy Anniversary!

Karen, Glad you had a good time at the barn. Talk to you later.

Gerry, Coffee please and thank you!

Sue, are you having a chance to sleep in?

Connie, enjoy the day.

Wishing everyone a super good day today.

Happy Anniversary, Darlene

Happy Anniversary Darlene! What are your celebration plans for your long weekend?

Good morning Haroula, Gail, Connie, Gerry and manxman. Hope all is well Sue.

Stormy night here but all is quiet this morning. I have to run to the store and then it'll be a corner day. I will get the dogs in for a run at some point.

Have a happy day!

Joe thanks for the chuckles this morning. May work fly and go well.

Ana may the corner be kind. Have a lovely run with the dogs, if ya go!

Space this is it....the weekend!! Just make it thru the day!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Karen glad you had a lovely day with the horses yesterday! Hope you are feeling well and things are going well for you!! Give Bella a cuddle for me. Have a lovely day!

Manxman have a lovely day!

Darlene Happy Anniversary!!!! Have a wonderful day!!!

Gerry thanks for teh coffee. have a nice walk and a lovely day!

Connie hows the knee doing? Hope it is getting better. Have a lovely day and thanks for teh danish!

Gail have a lovely day!!

No plans till taxi time and then off to work the fish fry at the Moose Lodge!!! Fun, fun, fun!!!


Nan

Nan, is this the opening day for the fish fry? Have fun when you go! I'm heading out now with the dogs so I can cross it off my list.

Ana

Fantastic Friday ya'll

Hubby and I popped up bright and early to take the monkeys to the park. It was cool and dark and we mostly had the park to ourselves until the sun rose, which was quite beautiful.

Then home to get everyone fed and out the door and the floors swept. Cully will be here in a few minutes and then I'll pick up Per around 3. It is such a gaggle.... only 20 minutes from the house but takes about an hour and a half because of the line to pick up. :arrrghhhh:

Have chatted with all the kids (talking with daughter now) and cleaning.

Had the weirdest thing happen last night while sleeping. I was fully convinced there was a man in his underwear trying to wake me up in the wee hours. Looked at the clock and knew it was way too early to be waking up. Poked hubby and asked if he had just poked me....Nope, not him. Then asked him if son was in the bedroom. Nope again. Dogs were not barking so it obviously was a dream, but holy moly, it was real (and strange).

Lots of things going on today...back later.

Finally! It's Friday. I thought this week would never end. Whew.

Yesterday was the worst stressful day I've had in a long time. Not that things are 'calm' around here, but this was so much more.

Went to get some 'free food' at the food bank at the park down the street. It's a neighborhood project they started with that 60 million dollars (yeah, 60) given to our 4 block area to improve stuff. Not sure what stuff they are improving since I see nothing happening, but all that money is going somewhere.

Anyway, once a month, you can go and get some canned food, and usually rice or beans and some frozen meat or canned meat. It's just a tidbit but sure helps out when your income is limited. They don't ask questions about income, or ask for any ID of any kind, so the line of people showing up keeps growing and growing. Most drive in and list 6 or more dependents. I claim ME. If you list more, you get more stuff. I walk down there with my tenant/friend and each of us gets a little bit. We 'trade' things if one of us don't like the item.

Yesterday, (waited 2 weeks past my regular 'date' because of the long lines and ended up spending about an hour anyway) there was this well dressed, lady, who I had seen walking the same way we were for the 2 blocks to the park. She got in line directly behind me. All of a sudden, she tapped me on the shoulder and said she was sorry to bother me, but she needed to tell someone...

And then it began! She spent the next 45 minutes telling me (at first I was actively listening and commenting) about her woes of poverty, losing her condo, losing her job, her car, can't see her son unless she pays 50 bucks an hour, ex hubby is a drug dealer, lives with dealers and users, son is being influenced, etc. It was much worse, but you get the picture. I felt sorry for her at first.

As the 'tale' progressed, she was blaming everyone from the court system to the President, to the schools, to the cops, to ad infinitum. AND she got so LOUD, she was shouting, then screaming (oh yes) and using obscenities so that everyone in the long line turned around to look.

So I finally had it. Figured out she was mentally unstable, might have all those problems, but I could see why, if she acted THIS way in court, that the judge always sided with the ex. So I finally said politely, that I was getting depressed and couldn't listen anymore, and was sorry for her problems. Then I turned back towards the front of the line and focused on 'happy thoughts'. SHE continued to scream her story to my BACK!

She didn't even seem to notice or care that nobody was listening. It was confirmed, she really was mentally unstable, so I tried to just be calm and polite and made sure when I got my food I got out of there in a hurry for fear she might follow me home to enlighten me further.

I felt so sorry for her and her troubles, but she didn't seem to want any help, just wanted to vent and I'm sure she would have talked to the tree nearby if that was the only living thing. So glad to get away from the screaming. I could still hear her 1/2 block away! AND she didn't even live in this area. Required for getting the food. She said she had to take a bus from a city about 30 miles away. I tend to believe her. Ugh. What a day!!

Tired today, just from the stress. Don't usually feel this way. BUT the good news (or strange news) is that the empty house from the poor old guy who is still in nursing care for over a year now) is FOR SALE. Hooray!

Didn't notice, no sign in yard, nothing, but two guys drove up, looked around the fence, took a few pics and off they went. I got on the realtor sites and found 2 that were listing it for sale as of 2 days ago. This is 6 weeks since anyone has been around there. Last was the guy's niece who was doing a cursory look through everything he hoarded. She left with his SUV and has never been seen again.

So it's listed for a horrendous price for what it is. AND only for 'serious investors'. They aren't saying what is wrong, but I know the whole story. No water service, plumbing is completely leaking and not working, still on septic (not sewer), needs new roof, termite damage all over, rotted window frames, missing boards on back porch, front porch crumbling, etc. ALL his hoard is still in there and have no idea what will happen to that.

Hoping it gets sold soon to some rehab outfit and that they fix it or tear it down. Can hardly wait to see who buys it. Room for another house on the land. Price is twice what it's really worth and house needs so much it would be cheaper to just tear it down and build a duplex. We will see, hopefully sooooon.

Such excitement, I'm exhausted, need Chocolate!

Happy Friday GBers!
I started a new work-from-home job on Monday with a company called Alpine Access Sykes Home. I am thrilled and am in training for the next 2 weeks or so. It's for customer service for one of the big companies they provide home based call center type workers for. A wonderful company that's been in business for several years. If you'd like more info, please PM me.
Otherwise, I'm having a lot of neuropathy pain in my feet and the sciatica is really attacking me right now. Ordered a good used office task chair that's considered ergonomic from Ebay. I sure hope it helps! Can't sleep this way if it doesn't get better.
My 4 cats and my puppy, Remy are all fine. You're all in my thoughts, and congrats to Joe and Ana for the good outcome of your tests. Happy anniversary to Darlene. Nice to see you, Karen! L4L good luck with your busy afternoon!
Enjoy the weekend!
Andrea

Edit: L4L, can you send the guy in his underwear to me?

Andrea If he shows up again tonight I'll grab him and send him overnight!

Hey hey hey everybody I'm home.

I hope you all had a great day so far. I couldn't get on this morning because of the rains. It's been rainy all day, but we're not getting any real rain. It's just the drizzly kind.

I'm surprised I could get here now because it's still very overcast and drizzly.

I've gotta pop off and fix my dinner. Tomorrow is not as early as today, but 6:00 is still early.

L4L I'm so sorry. I must have sleep walked and tried to wake you up for coffee last night.

Tonight I'll tie a rope around my ankle.

Andrea, sorry my feet hurt too bad to walk to Phoenix.

TTYL

joe

Welcome to the weekend Boomers.

Ana yes this is the first night of fish fry!!!

Well time to get ready and head out with the taxi and then head to the fish fry!!

Have a lovely evening everybody!!


Nan

Soooooo glad its Friday

Joe

Good night Boomers.